The Elders' House of Pain

Public Forum => SPAM Central => Topic started by: Paladin_Godfather on January 26, 2005, 10:00:47 AM

Title: Jokes.
Post by: Paladin_Godfather on January 26, 2005, 10:00:47 AM
I wanna hear everyone's best jokes... whether it be a one liner or a complex system of sentence often refered to as a paragraph... hit me with it



i'll start....

What do you call the useles skin around a vagina??  :? :?







A woman!!!  :mrgreen:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: NickFitz on January 26, 2005, 10:00:09 PM
Alright, now be prepared..this is a bad joke....BAD JOKE..SO DONT READ IT...but yeah

A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank; she has the title, and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a $250,000 Rolls as collateral against a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drives the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.

 Two weeks later, the blonde returns and repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely; but we are a little puzzled. We checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is - why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
 


 The blond replies....."Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"


HAHAH~~~!!! wait..that wasnt funny..enjoy  :mrgreen:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Paladin_Godfather on January 27, 2005, 09:11:35 AM
 :-D :-D



What do you call a blonde with pigtails?



a blow job with handlebars!!
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: T3H on January 28, 2005, 09:22:53 PM
your moms so loose it's like throwing a hotdog down a hallway.........lol





Your so poor, your bologna has no first name..........lol








 :mrgreen:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Paladin_Godfather on January 31, 2005, 09:42:22 AM
*WARNING: OFFENSIVE JOKES AHEAD!*






Why do tampons have strings?





So you can floss after you are done eating!!  :mrgreen:






What did one lesbian vampire say to the other?





See you next month!!  :evil:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: flintlock on January 31, 2005, 10:27:10 PM
With the big game comming up, this seemed appropriate enough.


  Peyton Manning, after living a full life, died. When he got to
heaven, God
was showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a
faded Colts flag in the window. "This house is yours for eternity,
Peyton," said God.
  "This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here."
Peyton felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house. On his way
up the porch, he noticed another house just around the corner. It
was a 3-story mansion with a blue and red sidewalk, a 50 foot tall
flagpole with an enormous Patriots logo flag, and in every window, a
Pat Patriot towel.
  Peyton looked at God and said "God, I'm not trying to be ungrateful,
but I have a question. I was an all-pro QB, I hold many NFL records,
and I even went to the Hall of Fame."
God said "So what's your point Peyton?"
  "Well, why does Tom Brady get a better house than me?"
God chuckled, and said "Peyton, that's not Tom's house, it's mine."
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: flintlock on February 01, 2005, 09:59:06 AM
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?



Juan on Juan
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: T3H on February 01, 2005, 02:02:53 PM
Guns are no more responsible for killing people than the spoon is responsible for making Rosie O'Donnell fat.









 :mrgreen:  lol
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Paladin_Godfather on February 01, 2005, 10:34:18 PM
 :-o :-o thug... quit while your ahead.... your canadian jokes are so... well, canadian!!


How do you stop a Canadian tank?

Shoot the two guys pushing it!
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: T3H on February 03, 2005, 11:55:50 AM
how do u keep an american busy?


make him try to escape the crimson room :P








 :mrgreen:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Paladin_Godfather on February 07, 2005, 10:05:59 AM
How do you get 4 thugs to sit on a bar stool??




Turn it upside-down!!!  :sunny: :mrgreen:

 
Eat It!  :thebirdman:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Death_ADDER on June 27, 2005, 10:32:45 PM
ohh paladin nice ones... all these jokes are pretty good

Steve
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on June 28, 2005, 03:37:17 AM
Here's a joke:  Thug.
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: TyDiRiUm on June 28, 2005, 12:29:46 PM
Heres one even funnier : Cole  :lol: :thebirdman:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on June 28, 2005, 12:35:17 PM
you shall never get there.  lol.  gl withh the 8 pages
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: TyDiRiUm on June 28, 2005, 12:36:19 PM
Don't start Cole. I have all day AND I'm not in a good mood. I will reply to anything and EVERYTHING in the next 12 hours.... :lol: :argue: :thebirdman:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on June 28, 2005, 12:37:25 PM
what's wronng man..  why the bad mood.  gf give you shit for spamming all day?
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: TyDiRiUm on June 28, 2005, 12:38:16 PM
No, we did it last night and I didn't want to "cuddle" with her... lol, so then comes the fighting  :lol: :argue: :headbang:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on June 29, 2005, 02:24:23 AM
lol.  So, just tell her that you don't love her, you just love effing her.
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Death_ADDER on July 01, 2005, 01:22:42 PM
lalalala... staring down the barel of a .45

Steve
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 13, 2005, 03:19:59 AM
c
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 13, 2005, 03:20:27 AM
so did you figure it out at grandma's house Tydirium?
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 13, 2005, 08:43:17 AM
lol.  i'm gonna kick the crap out of you the next time I see you.  lol  wadda ya think about that...?
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: TyDiRiUm on July 13, 2005, 09:25:40 PM
Now that Tyd is back, everythin can go bak 2 normal. Ya'll can start kissin my @$$ again... :-P :lol: :thebirdman:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Paladin_Godfather on July 13, 2005, 09:31:32 PM
What do you call a Man with no arm's and no legs on a wall........  Art
What do you call a Man with no arm's and no legs in a ditch........ Phil
What do you call a Man with no arm's and no legs in front of your door..... Matt
What do you call a Man with no arm's and no legs in the Ocean... Fucked :headbang1:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 14, 2005, 05:06:05 AM
Now that Tyd is back, everythin can go bak 2 normal. Ya'll can start kissin my @$$ again... :-P :lol: :thebirdman:

So, this was a joke...hahahahaha funney shit
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 14, 2005, 07:13:09 AM
don't even try spam
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 15, 2005, 03:01:52 AM
Democrats are sexy.

Who ever heard of a nice piece of elephant?
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Paladin_Godfather on July 15, 2005, 01:17:39 PM
you guys suck cause Ty's dumass comment overshadowed my good joke!!!  :thebirdman: :thebirdman:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 16, 2005, 06:51:58 PM
Republican.

Ass.
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Death_ADDER on July 18, 2005, 04:34:48 AM
canada good

Steve
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 18, 2005, 06:08:15 AM
lol. good one. 
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Paladin_Godfather on July 18, 2005, 05:49:23 PM
how do you fix a broken dishwasher?


you slap the bitch!


How do you turn a dishwasher into your snowplow?

Give the bitch a shovel.  :mrgreen:
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 18, 2005, 06:15:52 PM
but tell the truth, you just finished watching ice princess.
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: xTc the NJ GUIDO on July 23, 2005, 01:17:14 PM
Whats the first sign of AIDS?

A queer pounding you in the ass.
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: TyDiRiUm on July 23, 2005, 01:19:57 PM
Right... Guess you know that one x?  :? :-P
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 24, 2005, 04:39:57 AM
so xtc has AIDS is guess.
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on July 26, 2005, 04:18:46 AM
spamburgers
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Streetballer on November 09, 2005, 11:14:53 AM
Belgian_rofls
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Cole on November 09, 2005, 01:56:45 PM
poopshoot
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Streetballer on November 09, 2005, 02:25:31 PM
rofflubricant
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: Death_ADDER on November 12, 2005, 03:49:12 PM
spam
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: wonder. on November 07, 2006, 05:44:23 PM
want a good joke?  canada... ahhhahahahaha
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: He_Hate_Me on November 07, 2006, 05:46:02 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: wonder. on November 07, 2006, 05:46:40 PM
thats great
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: He_Hate_Me on November 07, 2006, 06:25:58 PM
SPAM ATTACK
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: wonder. on November 07, 2006, 06:35:50 PM
SPAM (to beat hate)
Title: Re: Jokes.
Post by: He_Hate_Me on November 09, 2006, 03:12:23 AM
I'M JUGGERNAUT BITCH